My Phone

is missing.

or stolen.

I'm not sure, actually.

Just delete my number from your contact list. I'll send/tell you my new number later.

Sir, Your Fly Is Open

The zipper on my pants has a mind of its own.

It opens up by itself.



Okay okay ... I'm fat.

There, I said it.

My hips is as wide as Ayala Ave.

So wide that it stretches my pants when I walk and opens up the fly so easily. And my one-eyed-monster junior peeks and says hello to passersby.

Over a month ago I weighed at around 190 lbs. A few weeks has passed and a ton of lard consumed I'm now at 200 ... my heaviest ever.

This is really REALLY bad.

Now all my pants is either size 34 or 35. And probably the next time I visit a clothing store I will be asking the store assistants for size XL or XXL shirt.

I remember the days when I used to wear large sized clothing ...

for kids.

I'm not kidding.

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